Second Life Blogs | Pixel Scoop | Virtual Worlds News

Whenever people have told me about prim boobs, I’ve always disqualified them as mythology… like Santa, or the tooth fairy. Falklore designed for discussion and campfire debate… nothing more.

But ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, nekos and furries, robots and toons…. PRIM BOOBIES DO EXIST.

I have proof [insert suspense driving music and maybe even a drumroll].

Erm….

What the f**k are they? The freakin’ Godzillas of the breast world? Do you girls really even need those? You have like all the breast control in the world from you appearance panel, don’t you?

Bet those don’t look good on the Emerald bouncy viewer…

Guess what? More bullshit press

The Daily Mail is reporting today upon the fact that a couple in Korea, who were convicted of allowing their three month old child to starve to death, were avid gamers raising a pixel baby in an apparently ‘Second Life type’ platform called PRIUS.

The Daily Mail Article of course places more emphasis on the fact that they were gaming addicts than anything else… of course there are no mention of all the children suffering at the hands of heroin addicts, or alcoholics.

Anyway… the fact these people even had a virtual daughter should have instantly said “crack pots,” surely?? )

I downloaded the beta of Second Life’s viewer with a little bit of uncertainy. After all, at least half of the viewer upgrades I do result in something that pisses me off. I figured a massive jump from 1.whatever to 2 was bound to leave me frustrated with something.

Now there’s already a ton of posts out there about the shared media malarky and all that jazz. This one isn’t about that.Instead it’s more a summary of the stuff I like, and the stuff I don’t. I’m not expecting you all to care what I like and there is a good chance that after more usage, I might change my mind about the stuff I don’t like. But anyway…

I like…

• The fact the the CTRL P shortcut still brings the preferences box up because I sure as Hell wouldn’t have a chance of finding it otherwise.
• It didn’t break my graphics. When I first upgraded from 1.22 to 1.23, anything with particles turned into a blob reminiscent of something out of a bad horror movie. This is the point at which I started using Emerald.
• The in world dashboard access… fantastic!! This is so, so long overdue.
• The ability to just access exactly what you’re wearing now in it’s own panel rather than having to type “worn” into your inventory window whatsit. It’s just… convenient.
• The colour scheme. Yes, it’s plain. And it probably won’t change the world or bring about world peace. But I like it.
• The fact that avatar profile pics show up as thumbnails at the side of the person’s name in your buddy list. Again, it won’t change the world, but I like it.
• Teleport history for the current session is readily available.

I don’t like…

• The way that people’s profiles display. It’s just…. annoying.
• The chat bar being so much smaller. I don’t  know why, but it irritates me.
• The fact that I can’t find where to change my bloody voice on shortcut thingie. The previous viewer allowed me to access voice setting via preferences and from there I was able to set it so that mic was open whenever I held ctrl down (when not on hands free anyway). I cannot figure out for the life of me how to do this in viewer 2. I am going to do Linden Lab the justice of offering benefit of the doubt and assuming that this is just because I am having a retard moment. If anyone does know how to do this, your assistance would be appreciated.

What I am trying to do is to comment less on “how different it is,” because at this stage, as I am still getting used to it, that’s something I could probably complain all day about. But I do agree with what LL are saying – it is going to be far more ‘familiar’ feeling to newer residents. And I think that newer residents will also begin to feel as though it’s more familiar after a while too. It’s certainly a positive change.

I just have to get used to it…..

Can anyone solve my voice riddle?!

PC Pro is a website I slated a while back…largely because they wrote a bullshit report with few facts and just basically declared Second Life to be a virtual world built on sex and otherwise empty spaces.

Anyhow, it seems Mark Kingdon (AKA M Linden) also decided to speak to PC Pro. You can read that interview here.

One or two points jumped out at me. Firstly, his comments on the adult grid:

“About 6% of the regions in Second Life are zoned ‘adult’ and we’ve looked at adult very extensively over the last year, through many different lenses… and we’ve found it a very average in terms of the prevalence of adult content.”

Now, it’s great that they’ve done all that and zoned it and whatever (actually, I’m not sure that’s great… it’s, well pointless) but there is still adult material on the mainland. Still. Still people having pixel sex on virtual beaches and whatever else. And, as with the “no traffic bots,” rule this is another case of bringing in a regulation for the benefit of most of the residents and then doing f**k all to enforce it.

The other thing that made me chuckle was Kingdon trying to refute claims that parts of Second Life are empty. He blamed it instead on “poor search tools,” and the fact that most places are on their own islands.

Erm… no Mark. It’s just that there are a alof of empty places. Open the map. Take a look!!

Anyway, regardless of that, I think it’s a great thing that Mark Kingdon has taken the time to speak to PC Pro following their article… at least it shows he gives a shit. Bravo on the proactive approach M! And while you’re being proactive, could you change your Linden name to something that’s searchable? One character names aren’t. No particular reason… it just annoys me a touch.

/me wanders off for some toast.

I hereby declare these commandments to be law. Ok, so I have f**k all power to enforce them. But Police Departments in world have bollock all power and people still seem to pay attention… so I am stamping my foot and demanding these be followed.

1. Thou shalt quit with the “No Drama Zone,” signs. It’s not funny. Everyone has them. And in my experience, those with the ‘no drama’ signs and profile messages tend to be the ones at the root of most of the drama. If you are the kind of person who had a need to stipulate that you don’t like drama, I’m thinking it must follow you around

2. Thou shalt not partner more than one person in a month. What is with people partnering like seventeen people a month. Really? I don’t get it. Is it a game? Is there a lotto I’m not aware of where the person who partners the most avies in Second Life gets something good? Please, enlighten me.

3. Thou shalt stop blinging. It gives me a headache and it stopped being cool 3 seconds after its creation.

4. Thou shalt stop wearing heels with the clicking sound. Girls, please! They never work. Lag. Lag stops everything like this from being as smooth as it should be. You stopped walking five minutes ago but your heels are still clicking. It makes me have to turn my sounds down.

5. Thou shalt quit with the spammy chain note cards. I get enough spam to my email, thanks. The note cards that are like the same as the emails… some random horror story and then “pass this to fifteen more avatars or else you’ll die a horrible death and your remains will be eaten by feral cats.’ Really? Bollocks to it. Trash. I will take my chance on the cats.

6. Thou shalt not play your freakin’ music over your microphone and through voice. It’s annoying. Really, really ennoying.

7. Thou shalt not beg me for Lindens. Seriously, if you are in such dire straits that you can’t afford to buy yourself a couple of dollars worth of Lindens, I suggest you log out and go find a job.

8. Thou shalt not leave your kids screaming in the background while you play on here. It makes everyone around you uncomfortable. Log out and feed them!

9. Thou shalt not create alts just to stalk people. It’s weird. And if you really feel the need to stalk people across the grid, you should probably question your sanity.

10. Thou shalt never, never, ever under any circumstances wear floaty text with your name on. WE HAVE NAME TAGS! I know your name because it’s on your tag. Why would you wear it again on floaty text above your head? You’re so good they named you twice. I don’t understand it…

Anyhow, rant over. I feel like ice cream.

Second Life profiles are the cause of more bloody drama and bullshit than I care to even waste my breath writing about. And people rarely mean what they say in their profiles. Here are some common profile lines and their translations from bullshit to English.

I DON’T DO DRAMA!!! This is actually bullshit for, “omg, omg, omg, omg I love a good fight. But only when I’m not involved!!!!!”

RL AND SL ARE SEPARATE COMPLETELY BUT I AM SINGLE. This is bullshit for, “My wife is deaf and so she can’t hear me sitting in the next room jerking off while cybring with a Neko who has a picture of a 22 year old blonde model in her profile, though in actual fact is probably a 59 year old obese man who grunts when he breathes.

I SPEAK TYPONESE!! This is bullshit for, “I have no originality or imagination and I re-use the same lines that I stole from someone else over and over and over and over again.”

MY IMS CAP ALL THE TIME, SEND ME A NOTE CARD. ‘This is bullshit for, “I once left a spammy object rezzed and it sent me loads of those green IM things and when I logged in it said my IMs are capped.”

CUSTOMER SERVICE BY NOTE CARD ONLY. This is bullshit for, ‘I’ve already got your money. Now f**k off.’

Et voila. Did I miss any?

The reason I don’t go to clubs in Second Life so often is because I get frankly bored of “Best in [insert random colour here," events. Guess what? Dressing up in red or yellow or black or fucking green for that matter takes all the imagination and thought that a bloody flea could muster.

And just when I thought [insert the first colour that springs to mind here and call it an event] events were unimaginative, I saw this….

These people couldn’t even be arsed thinking up the colours for you. I can imagine the conversation between the club’s owners when deciding the schedule for the week.

CLUB DUDE: So, we need a really original event for Thursday, the likes of which has never been seen on the grid before.

CLUB CHICK: Oh, ok. Best in black?

CLUB DUDE: It’s been done to death! Something else, come on!

CLUB CHICK: White?

CLUB DUDE: No, no… the whole virgin white thing has been overdone too. Give me some more colours.

CLUB CHICK: Erm… I… ummm…. well. I ummm….

CLUB DUDE: Come on! What are you waiting for??

CLUB CHICK: I can’t think of anymore colours. Why don’t we go for something totally different like Best in a Costume that Mimics a Celebrity who Died in 2009?

CLUB DUDE: Like… wtf? That is sooooooo not going to happen. The people want colours.

CLUB CHICK: Oh. I’m sorry.

CLUB DUDE: Well if you can’t think of any colours and I can’t think of any colours, there’s only one thing for it…. BEST IN ANY COLOURS!

CLUB CHICK: Isn’t that just the same as ‘come as you are?’

CLUB DUDE: Hmmm. You make a valid point. Then I will make it BEST IN BRIGHT COLOURS!

CLUB CHICK: Wow, you’re a genius.

CLUB DUDE: I know.

The end.

Ok, not the catchiest, shortest or most memorable title in the history of the blogosphere. But I don’t care… because I have evil squirrels. It will make sense soon.

So, following a sift through my inventory and a random discussion about photocopying your backside (not YOURS specifically) with Lisa Launay (who has an inventory full of the most random stuff on the grid), I was inspired to share. I know… I’m a giving soul.

So, allow me to share 3 Second Life freebies that you really, definitely, absolutely do not need but that I believe will make your life marginally better just by owning them.

[DISCLAIMER - 'marginally' implies that they will probably not change your life at all. They'll just make you smile, maybe. But they won't make you an instant millionaire, make you fall in love with the perfect person, make you feel a million dollars, get you the job of your dreams or inflict a terminal illness on your boss. Pixel Scoop accepts no liability for disappointment caused by the lack of really life changing occurrences].

Evil Squirrels

Abranimations has the coolest stuff and their freebies are no exception. These evil squirrels are… well… evil and squirrely. But funny in a ‘really pointless but I so want them,’ kind of way.

I love the fact that I can't explain why I love this so much.

Abramelin Wolfe is the creator and you can get it from here.

Particle Writing Crayola Style Crayon Thingie

This is cool. It’s a giant Crayola crayon. You go into mouselook and you draw things in the air with it. I love it. And yes, I used it for immature creativity.

Yes, here I am proudly being... umm... proud of my immature creation.

I honestly don’t know where in world you would pick one up from and the prims show up as a different creator (Niiya Narayan) from the script, prim and animation inside (created by Retarded Troglodite). So instead of giving you a SLURL, I will just have to say you can IM me for one. I have it full perms.

Butt Photocopier

This is a freebie I borrowed from Lisa Launay (trans but no copy). Lisa tells me you just have the IM the creator to grab one. And yes, it is a photocopier that you sit on and that spews out pictures of an ass. Yes, I know… I have the maturity of a drunk flea.

And for my next trick, I am going to turn 7!!

As I said, to get this one you just need to IM the creator. But I am retarded and cannot remember the name of the creator so I will update this afterwards when I get the name.

Anyhow, I think these things are absolute awesomeness. You might disagree. And I don’t care… Cookie anyone?

[UPDATE] The creator of the butt photocopier is Legov Reymont!!

So… I wandered into Aitui today and saw something bizarre. Now before the fashion bloggers get their machetes at the ready to cut me into tiny little pieces, I do like Aitui. But this just confused me.

Being the compulsively nosey bastard that I am, I had to find said stretched ears. It didn’t long. Funnily enough they were right by the sign…

So it seems the abnormally large piercings have made it into Second Life too. I do see people walking around with them occasionally in RL and for the life of me I don’t get it. Is it a sign that I am surely sliding towards my thirties, given my inability to understand the attraction in someone being to stick a finger through your ear lobe? Is it like some form of aural masturbation that I just don’t get??

Oh well. Pipe and slippers time for me.

I have blogged before on how disappointing I find it that so many people are flouting the rules when it comes to traffic gaming and that they are facing no consequences. Frankly, it just makes the rules pointless and a waste of the time it took to clarify and implement them.

And unfortunately, it seems to be a similar story for the adult content regulations.

“Promoted sexual content,” according to the Linden Lab guidelines, should be held on adult regions, that is to say the regions that can only be accessed by those who have taken steps to verify that they are over the age of 18.

There are certain words that cannot be searched without having adult search enabled. But a number of related searches (even down to ’skins’) will bring back locations that absolutely cannot possibily be called anything other than “orgy venues.” Photorealistic nudity, escorts, sexual activity right there in the location…. this is not adult content? Yet around the grid erotic exhibitions etc are relocating to adult locations to avoid the wrath of the Lindens?

Some consistency please?

‘Sex Island’ for example is a full sim with a mature rating. Escorts, large pictures of genitals and so on operate openly. Sexylife Island is much the same and this is just two of several I came across in a ten minute search.

Why even bother with these rules if they are not going to be enforced? I personally think that the whole idea of a separate adult content is stupid anyway. If the registration process was more efficient, there would be no need for an “optional” age verification setup on top of it. But after all the chaos about the adult move, after the removal of various art exhibits and enforced migration to the adult continent for businesses who relied on being accessible to everyone… why should a select few get away with flouting the rules?

Take this, for example… a fine example of something not classified as adult content.

If this is NOT adult content, then I apparently lack any concept of what defines adult.

Ok, granted, the Lindens probably do not have the resources to be monitoring every sim every day for adult content. But an entire sim called “Sex Island?” Well, if that doesn’t make one single Linden think, “Maybe I should just go check that out,” nothing will.