I’ve got an open comment policy here. There’s a reason for that. I tend to say what I think and sometimes people who disagree will want to have their say. I think the blogging platform is supposed to be two-way. It’s not a lecture hall where I stand up at the front and dictate my opinions to people.

If someone has something to say, they should be allowed to say it, particularly if I am talking about them or about something that affects them on a post I write.

I believe in checking comments before you send them live if you want to ensure nothing “unsuitable” for a general audience makes it on your blog (though I personally don’t). Absolutely. But unless something is spam or pornographic, I don’t think comments should be declined just on the grounds that a commenter disagrees with the opinions of the blogger. Unless of course, you want to run your blog like some sort of dictatorship – to each their own. But here, as long as your comment isn’t spam, it’s not going to get knocked back!

I’m not a massive fan of posts centred around making personal attacks on people. I think it’s juvenile, incredibly unimaginative and really is a form of bullying.

Myself and another individual were guilty of engaging in a load of blog mud flinging of this sort a month ago. Yup, guilty as charged. I think I went some way to rectifying that on this blog by modifying the guilty posts as necessary. It was a pretty low point in terms of my blogging and it’s something I regret allowing to make it onto this blog. Those sorts of things should, I believe, be reserved for personal and private disputes.

But if you have to say something negative about someone or you have to make a sweeping generalisation, at least have the decency to let people have their say back. It’s cowardly not to. While I might not always agree with what Prokofy, for example, has to say and while others (though I personally didn’t) sometimes took offence at some of things Adric had to say, at least an open comment policy is/was in place – those are bloggers who aren’t afraid of someone expressing a contrary opinion and are open to engaging in two way dialogue.

For me, the blogosphere should be the prime example of “Freedom of Speech.” We can all say what we want, to a potentially global audience within minutes. I personally just feel that if you are prepared to express opinions on a platform like a blog, then you have to have the balls to let people respond.

Feel free to disagree

[Update: "Offending" image removed from Smalltok post to ensure no further confusion between a post about a personal journey and "passive aggression".]

Today a post I wrote for Smalltok went live, with the title, “Confessions of a Second Life Addict.”

It was about my personal journey within Second Life – going from a cynic, to an addict and finally to someone enjoying a balanced SL/RL setup

I was asked to provide the topic matter and relevant images. I supplied this. It was up to Smalltok which images they ran. One I ran caused a little offence (an image of myself and a former partner). I included an image of myself with an even earlier partner too, though taken early on this year. But the point is they were relevant to the story I was telling. In light of the fact that one individual is offended by the use of one of the images, I have requested to Smalltok this be removed. In the meantime, I would just like to take this opportunity to reiterate the following-

• The article was about me using images taken by me.
• The article was not a dig or a snipe. It was about me. The site asked for a personal account and that’s what I have provided -  a personal account of my own journey.
• The article is in no way indicative of anything I want/don’t want from anyone in SL. Some people are arrogant enough that they’ve read the article as being some sort of attempt at stalking/hassling/annoying. If said people would stop checking up on articles by me then there’d be no issue.  The same individuals are the ones reading everything I post online and taking it to be about them (when it clearly isn’t) and then kicking up a fuss. When I write about me, it’s about me. If I write about creativity in SL – it’s about creativity in SL. There’s no secret codes, hidden messages or any of that in there.

Why should I be censored when it comes to expressing my own experiences?

You can read the article here and decide for yourself whether it’s offensive/stalkerish/psychotic or whether it is intended simply as an insight into my own personal journey.

I have learnt a LOT in my time in Second Life. I really have. I continue to love the platform. But I wrote the article because people assume a “Second Life Addict,”  must be a basement dwelling, socially disabled, obese, unhealthy, sexually starved moron. I wrote the article to point out that actually, educated, balanced people with friends and families can become just as immersed in that platform as anyone else.

I also wrote about it to highlight the importance, to me, of balance between SL time and RL activities. I love Second Life. I am passionate about the platform and the hordes of talented, amazing designers, builders, writers and scripters who make it what it is.

I will continue to write on RL blogs and websites about my experiences in SL. I will continue to write about the creative aspects of the platform. Yes, I’ll always have my own blog here – but this blog’s audience is primarily made up virtual worlds users. I also want to write for audiences who might not otherwise have ever heard about SL and I am going to do just that.

I’m fortunate enough now to have a great set of friends around me both in SL and RL, to have a great family around me and an amazing girlfriend. That stuff helps to put the snipes of a childish minority into perspective. But I wanted to put this out there to make it absolutely clear that my purpose for writing about SL on RL blogs is not to piss anyone off… it’s to  tell a story and to promote a platform that has afforded me more creative opportunity than I ever could have hoped for.

Talent. It’s the driving force of everything good in Second Life. From the comedy to the poetry, the building to the art, the scripting to the texturing… everything I love about Second Life comes down to the raw talent of the people who dedicate their time to making it what it is.

Of course, there’s things we all dislike about the platform too – drama, bad tabloid press and lag to name but three. But nobody can deny the amount of creative talent sharing Second Life.

I’m a particularly keen writer and love to watch people perform their poetry in world. It’s for this reason that I have taken up the opportunity to post each week on a RL poetry and art blog about SL poetry. The post will take the form of a machinima of a different poet performing some of their work each week and will showcase what SL’s poetry community has to offer to those who are passionate about poetry but who might not previously have even been aware of the existence of such a community within Second Life.

I will be posting the first one on that site this week and when it’s live, I will add more info, including the URL of the post, here.

In the meantime, anyone interesting in being featured in one of these weekly posts, get in touch!

…alright, maybe I won’t. But I totally know some people who could!

You wanna mess with me??? You do? Shit! I'm sorry.... I was only joking!

For anyone who is confused by my seemingly random declaration of intended violence, fear not. I’ve not just become a cage fighting wannabe and my avatar has not developed rabies. I have, however, just had a tour of Warriors Instinct Nations, a boxing gym and arena in Second Life.

I’ve seen boxing in world before and I’ve played around with some random (and not the best quality) freebie boxing gloves before. I was aware of a number of places boxing takes place in Second Life, without really knowing much about it. So today when I asked on Twitter for some inspiration about events going on and Abel Undercity mentioned a boxing tournament tonight, I caught up with him to find out more about it.

Warriors Instinct Nations is a boxing club, in essence, that was founded by Karine Koba some three and a half years ago, making it (as far as anyone is aware) the longest running club of its kind in SL. There’s a sparring gym, a store stocking everything you need to take part (and look good doing so) and a tournament arena.

Warrior Instinct Nations of Second Life

Boxers sparring and competing here can use either of their in-house developed systems… Aver and Fever. Fever, I’m told, requires only the gloves and thus aspiring Second Life boxers can get started for as little as L$125. Aver, on the other hand, requires three elements – a HUD, style and compatible pair of gloves. This system, however, gives you much more freedom and flexibility to develop your own style. The robes, shorts, boots, boxing systems and other accessories you can buy from the WIN store are what funds its facilities.

Purchase a pair of gloves and they’ll even give you free coaching. They also pay the winners of their prize tournaments and the participants of their sanctioned fights. Impressive stuff, huh?

Abel Undercity has been involved with WIN since it began. He’s involved with designing a lot of the boxing wear and coming up with the graphics. He’s clearly knowledgeable and to be with one organisation for 3 and a half years in SL shows a serious amount of dedication. 3 and a half years in SL is like a decade in RL!

The Gym - Boxers can spar and train here

So just how do you decide who wins a pixel boxing match? Well, Abel explained that, “It used to be that we’d have a live judge assessing the hits and scoring points, but recently we’ve added a HUD that tracks them automatically.”

That certainly simplifies the process and, I guess, means there can’t be “fisticuffs,” (pardon the punn) about who won! It’s an advanced system and, one they will soon be enabling others to implement in their own boxing gyms around Second Life.

Tonight (26^th September) at 5pm SLT, is the Heavyweight Fever Title Match, as well as a fight between the two middleweight champions for their respective belts.  You can visit that in world at http://slurl.com/secondlife/Warrior%20Instinct/184/147/61 if you’re up for watching! It will also be broadcast on Rezzed TV.

The Arena in which tonight's event will take place

There’s a really relaxed and approachable feel to WIN. They’re welcoming to beginners and will even show you the ropes. If you’ve got any speculative questions, IM Abel Undercity, who can point you in just the right direction.

This looks like a LOT of fun and something I am definitely going to try out myself.  I suppose one definite advantage is that getting the shit beaten out of you by a heavyweight boxer in Second Life is likely to hurt a whole lot less than it might in real life.

Those of you who read this blog regularly will have seen Adric’s smart and witty remarks here in the comments on a number of occasions and will have read his blog, Living on a Prim.

It’s with terrible sadness that I read a post this morning on his blog, here, reporting of his passing away in real life.

I am one of many, I am sure, who will be genuinely, genuinely devastated to hear this news. Adric Antfarm’s Second Life blog has not only enriched my SL-blog reader, but my daily routine for almost 2 years. His blogging has influenced mine in many ways and I was even the proud winner of an ‘Addie Award’ in January 2010… an awesome, witty, completely made up award from the depths of Adric’s mind! He contributed ‘beautiful’ photographic material on this blog from time time…. like this masterpiece.

He was a blogger who wasn’t afraid to be obscure, quirky and, most importantly, to say exactly what he thought. Even with no further posts on his blog, he will remain, I am sure, my favourite blogger.

It was only this morning that I was writing on my RL blog about things to be thankful for. If I were to have gone through everything that happens in my daily routine to make me smile, reading his blog would have been in there.

Completely, completely devastated.

I send my sincerest condolences to Adric’s (RL David) friends and family.

The blogosphere has lost a great contributor. Second Life has lost an amazing mind and the world has lost someone with one of the most unique outlooks on life that I have ever encountered.

Today is truly a sad, sad day.

Read More Tributes to Adric Antfarm

http://brinda-benares.blogspot.com/2010/09/this-is-jjust-visitenjoy-it.html

http://honour-mcmillan.blogspot.com/2010/09/rip-adric-antfarm.html

http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/general-sl-discussion/49450-rip-adric-antfarm.html

http://daleinnis.wordpress.com/2010/09/23/adric-antfarm/

http://skylar-smythe.blogspot.com/2010/09/remembering-adric-antfarm.html

http://danielvoyagerblog.wordpress.com/2010/09/23/adric-antfarm-has-passed-away-suddenly/

http://firstlife.isfullofcrap.com/2010/09/for_adric.html

http://secondthoughts.typepad.com/second_thoughts/2010/09/adric-antfarm-logs-off.html

http://headburroantfarm.wordpress.com/2010/09/23/goodbye-cousin-adric/

Today I have a broken pixel heart. Look…

Let me tell you why. In fact no. I’m too broken hearted to explain it. Let me show you [insert sniffle].

In May I got partnered to a beautiful, sexy, hot, wonderful, funny, SL-fashionista and general person extraordinaire… Ms. Bubbles Komachi. And today… [insert some more sniffles for effect here] well today she broke my heart. No… let me rephrase. Today she took my pixel heart from my pixel chest and she threw it on the floor, stamped on it with her sculpted stiletto heels and then threw prims at it… PHYSICAL prims.

I just don’t know what I did to deserve this behaviour [I think we should go for some more sniffles here, right?]

I checked my email a short while ago and, while I would love to explain to you what I saw but my broken heart is preventing me from finding the words so I will just show you the snapshot instead.

I particularly love how they try to soften the blow with “Your friends at Linden Lab.” It’s like… “Don’t worry, buddy. You might just have gotten dumped, but we still want your premium fee love you.” They then go on to encourage drama by encouraging direct contact. Dangerous, lol!

Anyway, why am I “lol-ing?” I am broken hearted here!!!

But on a serious note, our “break up,” didn’t really happen like that!

Bubbles and I partnered in May, when I decided I was categorically never dating in SL again and she was on pretty much the same wavelength. We never had “that” type of relationship and were always just friends who were partnered. Partnering my best friend in world was an affectionate declaration of the fact that she was the most important person to me in world. And we had a good run…. 4 months. That’s like a lifetime in SL, right? However, my Bubs is being snapped up by a new fella, as she IMed to explain:-

[14:22] Bubbles Komachi: ooooh adam!  *snuggles adam*  i’m going to have to beak up with you now.  You see, i’m getting super jealous of chloe and you just arent spending enough time with me. so im dissolving our partnership.
[14:23] Bubbles Komachi: ROFL!!  no seriously.. Dev and I are taking our little relationship to teh next level and we’re both ready to partner! *squeals* I really like him! and i’m a little surprised i Do but we’re tkaing it day by day and he’s never partnered anyone and I havent REALLY partnered anyone in a long time. so. umm.. yayyy!  I think i’m gonna blush lol

That brought a smile to my face. Things are going really well for me and my RL gf, Chloe, so I still maintain that I certainly wouldn’t consider SL dating. But Bubbles and her new guy are both single (I personally see this one heading into RL for them both) and make each other really happy. So I’m chuffed to bits for her!

However, as happy as I am for her, that doesn’t mean there won’t be a divorce dispute.

Bubbles Komachi: I, Bubbles Komachi, would like to dissolve my partnership with Josue Habana

Bubbles Komachi: and a lil box to check it

Bubbles Komachi: and i got charged 25Ls

Bubbles Komachi: rofl

Bubbles Komachi: awwww josue!!!!

Bubbles Komachi: my box looks all empty without you

Josue Habana: dumped

Josue Habana: ROFLMAO

At this point, I paid Ms. Komachi L$13 in contribution to the legal expenses associated with our divorce.

Bubbles Komachi: lol

Bubbles Komachi: splitting the lawyer fees?

Josue Habana: yup

Josue Habana: im good like that

Josue Habana: But you’re not getting half my prims.

Bubbles Komachi: i dont want half of your prims!

Josue Habana: Fine

Josue Habana: well

Bubbles Komachi: im a girl.. i’d want them ALL

Bubbles Komachi: and your blog too

Bubbles Komachi: thanks

Josue Habana: ROFLMAO

Bubbles Komachi: im thinking… Bubbles’ Pixel Scoop… nice ring to it

Josue Habana: Look, I’ll cut you a deal…. you get half the prims, a guest post slot and…. umm…. 3L per week maintenance. Plus an ongoing dose of my blowing sunshine up your ass.

Josue Habana: See… I won’teven deprive you of the anal sunshine.

Bubbles Komachi: aww adam!

Bubbles Komachi: it’s love

Bubbles Komachi: it’s REALLY REALLY lvoe

Josue Habana: I’m pixel heart broken damn you.

Josue Habana: lol

Bubbles Komachi rethinks this non-parntered thing

Josue Habana: haha!!

Bubbles Komachi: hmm

Bubbles Komachi: i think right now

Bubbles Komachi: for the next few hours

Josue Habana: You’re gonna be happy

Bubbles Komachi: i just need to be single.. single and nursing my pixel heart

Bubbles Komachi: yes

Bubbles Komachi: no partnership for… 5 hours

Josue Habana: haha

Bubbles Komachi: maybe 6!

Josue Habana: typical SL

Josue Habana: departner and partner someone else within about 6 hours! Haha

Josue Habana: LOL!

So, my Bubbles is all “partnered” and schtuff for real! Woot! I’m thoroughly enjoying seeing so many people around me happy. But I have to laugh at the fact that I managed to get pixel dumped without even really pixel dating! A certain sign, surely, that I’m just not cut out for the SL dating stuff!!!

I personally don’t date in Second Life anymore. I’ve got myself an amazing girlfriend in real life and for me, even a “pixel fling,” is cheating. But I’ve had some great experiences in SL and certainly enough experience to comment.

Last night I nipped in world for a bit and a buddy of mine from France is seeing a woman from Boston MA. His time schedule is all over the place and he’s spending a lot of time with her at what are funny hours for him. He was clear with the woman in question that it was just a “Second Life thing.” He’s got a girlfriend in real life, told his partner this and she told him she was married anyway, so it was SL only for them both. Fair enough –I personally wouldn’t do it, but whatever floats your boat.

Anyway, last night they had a big fight and departnered because the woman in question had displayed some rather worrying signs – like looking up his real life address and sending him a lock of her hair doused in her perfume in the post. Not something that went down so well with his girlfriend in real life, as you can imagine. We had a brief chat last night and he was telling me a number of things she had done that started to worry him. So that’s the inspiration for this post – 10 signs that your pixel partner is restraining order material.

1.       He or she has met you, IMed you and suggested you buy a parcel together within 1 hour.

2.       He or she wants to know within literally hours what you do in real life and where you’re from.

3.       You’ve told them your real life name – but they want your surname, like now, as well.

4.       They openly admit to Googling your real life name and/or your place of work within the first week of knowing you.

5.       They tell you they know what colour your real life front door is, despite living on another continent. They then admit they’re not psychic but they looked up your postcode and used Google Street View.

6.       They follow this with “I could imagine myself going home through that front door.”

7.       They ask what your real life children are called within days of meeting you and then begin telling you that they think they’d be a great “auntie/uncle/stepmother/stepfather to the little ones.

8.       They tell you they are going to take a holiday in your city, adding that “I know you said we won’t ever meet in real life and that’s fine, but I’m going to book a hotel on the street behind you because I have always wanted to see [insert city name spelt incorrectly here]. Now if you live in a big city and someone has business reasons to go or family in a similar area, you have to give a bit of credit – but if it’s just a “holiday” and you happen to live in a really small and boring town, you should be concerned.

9.       They tell you they’ve looked your girlfriend/boyfriend up on Facebook and that you can do better.

10.   They manage to get your mobile phone number without you giving it to them – and then ring you “accidentally” like all the time!!

Any of those signs could be a cue to log out – like now!

I’ve long said that I believe someone who is married in RL is carrying out infidelity if he or she carries out a relationship or any sort of sexual encounter in Second Life. Whether you are actually physically touching somebody or not, the fact that you’re getting intimate with someone else, are allowing yourself to become aroused by someone else, that to me is infidelity.

I have a girlfriend in RL and I wouldn’t ever consider anything in SL while that was the case. She would consider it cheating and I would too. I’m partnered in SL to one of my best friends and amc lear on my profile that anything I have with anyone in world is PLATONIC.

I got into a debate about this last night with a friend of mine from SL. He knows I am writing this post and has asked only that I withold his name. He is married in RL, partnered in Sl and thinks this is ok. I argued my case last night and he argued his and, as I told him, some of the ways he justifies, or attempts to, what he is doing, are laughable. It’s not the first time I’ve heard such justifications though. His attempts at justifyig included:-

1. “My wife doesn’t know.” Umm, ok. So not only are you cheating on her, you’re lying too then. If you were to have sex in RL with a colleague but your wife didn’t know, would that be ok?

2. “I don’t physically touch my SL partner.” No, granted, but you cyber with her and connect on a sexual level in that way. You fantasise about the things that you would like to do to her and you’re aroused by her telling you the things she would like to do to you, were she to ever get her hands on you. That, to me, is a form of cheating.

3. “Fantasising is harmless.” Yes, it is. When you sit alone and you fantasise about someone you’ve never met or will never meet, like celebs or whatever. But when you are actually openly discussing your fantasies with the object of them, there’s more than just you involved. You are involving someone else in what shuld be your own personal fantasies and if that person isn’t your spouse, then you’re cheating, surely?

4. “It doesn’t affect my relationship with my wife.” How does it not? When you dedicate ten or more hours a week to being in Second Life to carry out an illicit virtual relationship, are those not ten hours a week you could be spending with your wife?

5. “My wife is in bed when I am online.” Which begs the question, why aren’t you in bed with her?

6. “It’s only SL.” Do you ever think about your pixel partner when you’ve turned the computer off? Even if she just crosses your mind for a brief second, then no, it’s not just “online.” Humans cannot possibly separate “online” and “offline,” 100%. I don’t believe that’s possible at all.

7. “Online things don’t count.” Ok, so if your wife took her colleague’s Skype address, went home and got on Skype to cyber with him one night, would that be acceptable? No? Thought not.

The guy is actually a great bloke. Honestly. But he and I clash on opinions here. The attempts, for me, at justifying having a SL and a RL partner, just don’t work. We’re not programmed to live two completely sepearate lives. In fact, some people would think those who try have some sort of personality disorder. We live one life. SL, for those of who spend time there, is just a part of that real life. So surely, the same morals and ethics should apply?

A quick machinima post! I’ve always been a fan of “Lost World,” a stunning ruins location in Second Life by Lolmac Shan. You can find it here.

Anyway, the machinima is inspired by my love of ruins, my love of the musician whose backing track I have used (Roger Subirana Mata) and the fact I am in awe of Lolmac Shan’s work on Lost World.

If you’d prefer to watch in HD, you can do so by going to full screen mode on the actual Youtube video page, here.

I just read an article entitled, “We All Live In a Virtual World,” by Maria Korolov, which goes into striking comparisons between ‘real and virtual worlds. It’s an absolutely amazing article and, as such, I wanted to share it. You can find it here: http://ieet.org/index.php/IEET/more/korolov20100903 and I certainly recommend a read.

One quote in particular I want to share is: “You can have anything you want in a virtual world, as long as you either make it yourself, or have the virtual currency to buy it from someone else. It is not that different from real life today.

And real life and virtual life are getting more and more similar.”

The rest, yuo should go through and read.

But it did get me thinking about the striking similarities between Second Life and real life. Politics IS present even in our virtual world, with its citizens up in arms with the “leaders,” (Linden Lab) every time something happens that we do not like, with the “Leaders” punishing illegal (or anti ToS behaviour) by removing those people from the (virtual) society, either permanently or temporarily.

Our avatars have educational needs, just like real people. We have to learn the basic skills required to navigate out virtual world. Once you know the basics, how much more you learn is up to you. A little like the choice between leaving school as soon as you can or going into Higher Education. Do you just want the basics? Or do you want to be a builder? A scripter? Do you want advanced skills and, if you acquire them, can you put them to use in making a “virtual living?” Can you use your acquired skills to pay your tier?

The writer of that article draws some phenomenally interesting comparisons. One of my favourite reads of the week!